People, with all their complexities, have an innate desire for security, good health, and happiness. We often proclaim our commitment to constantly working towards these goals. However, it’s fascinating to realize that many of us unknowingly sabotage ourselves in achieving them.
Change is not something we readily embrace. Deep within, we yearn for tomorrow to mirror yesterday. It’s ingrained in our DNA, a part of our programming. This resistance to change is evident when it comes to transforming our lives and reaching our goals. We are resistant to change.
As human beings, we have devised two strategies to maintain the status quo while still setting goals. One approach is to set unattainable goals—ones that we know, deep down, we can never reach. It gives us the appearance of being incredibly ambitious, a way to ‘sell’ ourselves to both others and our own selves. We proudly showcase our pursuit of these lofty goals, yet our subconscious recognizes that nothing will truly change.
The second strategy involves setting realistic goals and genuinely working towards achieving them, but then using external circumstances as excuses for why things remain unchanged. “If only I had more money to invest,” we say. “If only I were more attractive,” we lament. “If only I were a man,” we sigh. The list goes on. However, if we examine the lives of extraordinary individuals like Oprah Winfrey, we discover that she never uttered the phrase “If only.” Oprah is a woman, a person of color, and a survivor of abuse, yet she became one of the world’s most renowned and financially successful individuals.
We frequently sabotage our dreams because we are often consumed by fear. We fear losing the support of friends and family if we become successful. We fear rejection and being turned down. We even fear leaving the familiar neighborhood we despise.
Consider the powerful story of a woman trapped in an abusive relationship. Each day, her husband unleashes his frustrations upon her. One day, she gathers the courage to leave. She packs her bags, waiting for her husband to depart. As she walks the streets, embarking on her journey towards happiness and freedom, doubts begin to creep in. What if she never finds a new life partner? Will she be okay? Overwhelmed by uncertainty, she makes a fateful decision to turn back, just in time to unpack and endure the inevitable beating. This tale, shared by a famous French philosopher, reveals that we sometimes choose to endure pain rather than embrace change.
But what about you? Are you willing to walk away towards happiness, or do you simply desire tomorrow to mirror yesterday? The choice is yours to make, and it’s never too late to pursue the life you truly deserve. Embrace change, overcome fear, and take that first step towards a brighter future. You hold the power within you to shape your destiny.